Rio

Take a room and add 50 beds. Pop a person on each bed. Now swap each bed for a seat and arrange them so they form two rows of two, all facing the same direction. Allow each seat to recline just enough so that the backs sit nicely on the knees of the person behind. Now exchange the room for a bus. Sprinkle the sound of an engine, snoring and farting. Scent with cheesy crisps, breath, feet and aforementioned flatulence. Now set an alarm for 24 hours and settle in.

Our journey to Foz du Iguacu was not the best, however it did allow us to reflect on our experience in Rio de Janeiro:

Rio has it all: Sun, sand, ocean, mountains, jungle, poverty, wealth, gangs, favelas, BMW's and burnt-out Beetles, Samba, drums, drugs, crime, love and life.

Of course there are the mandatory tourist hives such as Christ the Redeemer and Sugar loaf mountain, but our best experiences came from elsewhere.

We did visit the Big Jesus, and it has to be said that the statue itself, and the views from where it stands are awesome in the literal sense. The drawback is the tourism. It's hard to complain about tourists when you are one yourself, but when you're penned in like sheep and being constantly whacked with selfie-sticks and pushed aside so that yet another gimp can pose like Big Jesus in front of Big Jesus so they can instantly update their profile picture, the 40 degree heat can get to you.

Originally, we'd planned on having 5 days in Rio then move down the coast stopping at various places. After leaving Rio and having a poor experience in Paraty (story to follow), we decided to return for another week and soak the place up.


So, in no particular order, here are the highlights.


The Maracana: Brazil's national football stadium which housed the World Cup Final last year. This 80,000 capacity ground holds the record for the highest attendance at a game: 199,000 back in 1950 for Brazil v Uruguay. Obviously things have changed since then. A few clubs share the ground for home games, and we got ourselves to the Flamengo v Boa Vista tie. Flamengo brought over 24,000 fans who made the noise of 80,000. Boa Vista brought about 6 who made the noise of a Hamster.


Flamengo won 2-0 and the atmosphere throughout the game was incredible, especially after the first goal.

Santa Marta favela tour: A guy who lives up in the favela organises small group tours. He met us at the bottom and took us up the recently installed cable car up the top. The views are spectacular, reaching from central past Copacabana and Botafogo bay to Ipanema and Leblon. Our walk through the favela revealed the contrast in wealth, even inside the poorest communities. Modern concrete structures over shadowed dilapidated, corrugated iron huts. Locals went about their daily business while kids played, all under the watchful eye of the UPP (Pacifying Police Unit). We felt safe and welcome; often greeted with smiles and "Oi's" (which means 'Hi'). Overall, an authentic experience of the 'real' Rio.

Claudio Coutinho Trail: starting right beside the expensive cable cars for Sugarloaf Mountain, this free walk takes you along a shady path, with a jungle on one side and the ocean on the other. Wild monkeys gather in the trees and exotic birds roam the skies. We really enjoyed this little roam in nature, getting away from the city. After the trail we enjoyed the sunset and a coconut on Praia Vermelha (Red beach).

On our return to Rio, we checked in to a little hostel that sits between Ipanema and a favela called Vidigal. After a little haggling about our room, we were moved to a double with ensuite with an amazing view of the ocean - we extended our stay straight away. Nearby was a quiet (except on Sundays) beach which was mainly visited by the residents of the favela. We spent most days relaxing here, soaking up the sun and munching on fresh pineapple and watermelon. In the evenings we wandered in to the favela. Only a few years ago, we would've been greeted by a gang holding machine guns who would decide whether we could enter or not. Since the police pacified the favela, the guys with machine guns now wear uniforms and allow you to enter without negotiation. At the foot of the favela lies a square surrounded by bars and food stalls (one was a BBQ serving skewered meats. Got in amongst that many a day). One afternoon we noticed they were setting up some kind of performance. We learned from a local that whatever it was, it was starting at 9pm. Being European, we arrived at 8:30 to make sure we had good seats. Being South American, the performance started at 10:30pm. Well worth the wait though: a live band followed by a 40-man drum performance. Hundreds of locals (and a handful of gringos) danced away and enjoyed cheap local beers and cocktails. Definitely a night to remember.

On our last evening, we took motorbike taxis up to the top of Vidigal to enjoy the sunset and some of the best views Rio has to offer. The motorbike drivers are mental. Mine swerved between moving vans and almost hit a woman and child. Stine's was more conservative but still nearly managed to crash. We relaxed in a bar the the very top before walking down. We got lost a couple of times, weaving our way down past people's modest gardens, came across a track made of tyres filled with sand, walked through a beautiful garden with tables made from bicycle wheels, through make-shift football pitches and local bars. All the while receiving smiles and kind words.

All in all Rio was a fantastic experience. Next stop, Iguazu falls.